NS
Creatures
Sing To Me Once More
About a passion by Natalie Slaba
You are on my mind AGAIN,
You ridicule my logical thinking,
Interrupting my task,
You create controversy, transforming my head into a playground.
“Let’s disappear” you tempt my conscience,
“I will take you to a land free of these constructed thoughts,
And there you will find your genuine worth.”
Fatigued, my conscience obeys,
Together, you escape, stretching the borders of my imagination,
But advancing too far,
Past a point that is no longer relatable with the outside world,
Making it dificult for me to connect with 'reality',
Left without my conscience, there are no restrictions,
My hand clutches a paint brush,
And at once all the nerves in my body are awakened,
Roused by an inhale of the purely familiar smell of colour,
My heart begins to sing a song, which I am finally able to understand,
My veins flowingly extend out of my fingers to hug around the paint brush,
Transforming into paths, they carry my heart out onto the surface,
Now my heart is not only feeding myself,
But this supplimentary creature I am creating,
And with each stroke it strengthens.
I express what my words cannot verbalize,
Then pause and expect my conscience.
But sometimes the hour passes and the sun sinks, without its return...
It gets pitch black and I don’t know where I am,
What country?
What city?
What house?
Now, instead of the usual silence a circus arrives, and without bounderies I let it in.
BOOM! Explodes my sanity,
Slowly, I become lost between people,
Missunderstood, I call for help but their laughter outnumbers my cry!
Wouldn’t it be ironic if the daughter of globalization,
The one who has travelled across a relatively large portion of the Earth becomes lost in her own head?
I need something familiar
Something I, me, myself, can relate to,
I am desperate for a feeling of security,
I am conscious of your constant presence within my head;
You initiated the confusion, bringing up concepts that I don't understand,
Again, I reach for a paintbrush, and let out the chaos in my head.
The voices are scilenced,
And even if missinterpreted, the negative and positive feelings are in the open for everyone to see,
I blame you for my disease,
Even though you are my sole cure.
Without you I would be the same as everybody else,
You define my presence,
And I aspire to define yours in return.